Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Southern Students Busted (?) for Spilling Seed in Showers [UPDATED]

Bad news! Southern Adventist University students have been committing the same sin for which Onan (the Barbarian, in Genesis 38:9ff) was smitten by God. That is, they have been spilling their seed on the ground. In showers, apparently. That's right, Southern Adventist University has been after its boy students for masturbating in the washrooms. The posted notices in Talge Hall bathrooms received thoughtful replies from students: "Let us bring in girls, or we're gonna keep on Onaning in the showers!"

It reads: 

We have recently found several blockages in showers in university owned accommodation, most commonly caused by human hair.

However, over last term we found many of these blockages to be caused by large quantities of what we have now determined to be semen. This is [indecipherable]. The shower drains and plumbing were not designed to handle the amount of semen being put into the system.

We advise students to remember that masturbating is a sin. If you believe otherwise, we ask that you please help keep our dorms sanitary and avoid doing so in the showers. 

For any further questions, consult your RA. The [indecipherable] staff and your fellow dorm mates appreciate your cooperation in this matter. 

via Gio Writes Here

UPDATE: So, it turns out that this is a fun little prank that has been making its way around dorms in the U.S. and A (see comments section). What is obviously true, given the hand-scribbled response is that...well...