Jay Gallimore

Jay Gallimore is the president of the Michigan Conference of Seventh-day Adventists. According to the Michigan Conference website, "The president is the spiritual leader of those in ministry and overseer of all the churches."

Gallimore likes evangelism. A lot. He is a former evangelist himself (though he still does evangelistic meetings), and he works with David Asscherick's ARISE Institute and Louis Torres's Mission College of Evangelism. By "works with" I mean hires people from the field schools of evangelism to work in the Michigan Conference.

A look back at the sketches of '08

Happy New Year!

Some Doug Batchelor after Andy Warhol to ring in the New Year.

Marvin Mooreclaus

Robert Folkenclaus

Doug Batchelorclaus

"Anonymous" requested a version with a Christmas tree, mostly for the sake of snarkiness. I happily oblige. It's what I do. Happy Holidays, says Mr. Batchelor. (See comments)

Monte Sahlinclaus

David Asschericklaus

Don C. Schneiderclaus

David Gates

David Gates is a well-known missionary pilot who works out of Guyana in South America. Gates, a director of ADRA in the region, also speaks extensively to audiences around the world. He has generated significant buzz lately for his teaching that Jesus must return by or before 2031, and that the current global economic crunch will lead to an apocalyptic doomsday scenario that will usher in the Second Coming.

If it seems his head is in the clouds, remember that what goes up must come down. There's your mixed metaphor for the day.

You can read more about his unique teachings and see video clips by following this link.

Holiday Cheer

Don C. Schneider

Don C. Schneider is the president of the North American Division of Seventh-day Adventists. He has his own TV show called Really Living. Really Living features Adventists who are evidently not pretend-living, they are (you guessed it) really living.

Schneider was a runner up in the recent Adventist popularity contest here on Caricatures of Adventists. He was barely edged out by David Asscherick. Although he did not win, he deserves his own caricature (you're welcome).

Schneider had surgery in October for a cyst in his brain. The cyst affected his vision and gate. Internet reports reveal that he is making a good recovery after the surgery.

Here's a nursery rhyme about Don Schneider:

Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet
Eating her curds and whey (this was before she became a vegan).
Along came a spider dressed up like Don Schneider
And invited Miss Muffet to attend an evangelistic meeting.

THE END

How David Asscherick Became Rob Bell

David Asscherick is an Adventist evangelist and the main man for ARISE Institute (and please do not leave out the "I"). Asscherick (pronounced ASH-rick) won the Caricatures of Adventists who's-the-most-popular-Adventist contest by 4 votes over second place finishers Don C. Schneider and Hans Deihl. The prize for winning that popularity contest is the caricature above. Congratulations.

I also decided to tell David Asscherick's life story, or something close to it. Relatively little is known about Asscherick's early years, but they might have looked something like this:In order to fit in with other kids his age, young David wore a rubber mask and fought crime.He went through that awkward teenage phase that we all go through.As he matured, he began to transform into a nice young man who used to be a punk rocker and extreme sports enthusiast, but isn't any more. Except he still likes surfing and rock climbing, which could be considered extreme by some Adventists' standards.Now he preaches to youths and old people too, and he wears trendy glasses.David Asscherick, the guy who used to look like Alfalfa now looks like a postmodern, urban guy.In order to complete the transformation from somewhat geek to somewhat chic, David Asscherick stopped combing his hair to one side in order to look like...Rob Bell, who is a famous postmodern Christian guy who makes short movies with edgy themes. David Asscherick, who is sort of famous, but not really postmodern also makes short movies that are kind of edgy, in an Adventist way.
The End.

Monte Sahlin

According to Monte Sahlin's typepad bio, he is "chairman of the board for the Center for Creative Ministry, a research organization and resource center helping pastors, congregations and other organizations understand new generations and how to engage with them. He is also chairman of the executive committee of the Center for Metropolitan Ministry, a "think tank" and training organization based on the campus of Columbia Union College in Washington, DC, as well as an adjunct faculty member at the Campolo School for Social Change at Eastern University in Philadelphia and in the DMin program at Andrews University. In addition, he serves on the steering committee of the Cooperative Congregational Studies Partnership, a coalition of researchers from more than 40 denominations and faiths who produce the Faith Community Today (FACT) research."

I lifted all that directly from his page and probably couldn't say it all in one breath. Which means that he does a lot!

Oh ya. He also blogs.

Asscherick Takes the Lead

In early polling (see the sidebar on the right), David Asscherick has a growing lead over Hans Diel and Don Schneider. With only a few days of voting left, can Asscherick ride this wave all the way to the finish line where the Adventist Caricaturist's ruthless pen awaits? Only YOU can decide that!

Pastor Doug does a Governor Palin

You might find this interesting (or you might not). Pastor Doug Batchelor, speaker / director of Amazing Facts preached a long-winded sermon on homosexuality. You can watch the video on the AF website under a large banner that says, ironically, "Everlasting Gospel". Not that good news has much to do with it. But whatever.

The video has a couple of interesting lines in it. Like the statement that Jesus predicted this would be one of the obvious signs of the end. Interesting. I don't think Jesus ever mentioned homosexuality. But then, the facts there are supposed to be amazing...

Ted N. C. Wilson Holds the Keys to the Kingdom?

Ted Wilson has done all sorts of interesting things - lived in Abidjan, been president of something large and significant in Moscow, and received a Ph.D. in Religious Education from New York University. To some astute GC watchers, this puts him next in line for the presidency of the General Conference of Seventh-day Adventists once current president Jan Paulsen leaves the post. And to further drive the Ted-Wilson-as-president buzz, this official picture from the GC website has Wilson at the front of the line of current vice presidents ahead of Ella Simmons, who looks awfully lonely floating amid the veep sea of men. And what is with the creepy right-eye motif?

Of course from another perspective, the picture above has Ted Wilson as far away as he can be from current president Jan Paulsen, indicating that Wilson is least likely to become the next Prez. Some folks have hinted that Mark Finley (who for some strange reason reminds me of Kermit the Frog) might be next in line.The truth of the matter is that all this guesswork about who might be the next leader of the Free SDA World is premature. Jan Paulsen is doing a fine job of presiding, and until the conclave with its grey smoke and white smoke, the speculation will just have to sit patiently like a kid in church.

Rajmund Dabrowski

A while ago I got a request for Rajmund Dabrowski (please call him Ray). Director of Communication for the General Conference of Seventh-day Adventists. You can find out much more about Ray Dabrowski including a podcast interview he did with Alexander Carpenter of Spectrum Magazine here.

Ray owns one of the top five most caricatureable Adventist faces of all time!

Obama Biden 2008 [Miami Vice President]

Barack Obama and Joe Biden recently lit up the Denver mile-high sky with rousing speeches and the "yes we can" squad at the Democratic National Convention. Now the party is over. Turn those fireworks into work for those who were fired! Then America will be fired up and ready to go.

McCain and Palin [Beauty and the Beast]

The Internet is all abuzz with the news that John McCain picked Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin as his Vice-Presidential running mate. With McCain for President and Palin for VP, the Republican Party hopes to attract fans of a classic tale we've heard before.

~With Apologies to Disney