Holiday Cheer

Global Financial Crisis Hits Adventist Church

The global economic downturn that accompanied the recession in the U.S. (yes, it's official, folks) has brough tough times to the Adventist Church as well. An Adventist News Network (ANN) headline reads, "Adventist Church Tightens Belt." Adventist Today notes that the Adventist Church plans to reduce the subsidy it provides Loma Linda Universty (reg req.).

The Church, along with everybody else, is watching as its assets turn to smoke. The subtext of this Editorial Cartoon is the recent fire that damaged the Adventist Church Headquarters in the UK. ANN reports on the fire's devastation here.

Don C. Schneider

Don C. Schneider is the president of the North American Division of Seventh-day Adventists. He has his own TV show called Really Living. Really Living features Adventists who are evidently not pretend-living, they are (you guessed it) really living.

Schneider was a runner up in the recent Adventist popularity contest here on Caricatures of Adventists. He was barely edged out by David Asscherick. Although he did not win, he deserves his own caricature (you're welcome).

Schneider had surgery in October for a cyst in his brain. The cyst affected his vision and gate. Internet reports reveal that he is making a good recovery after the surgery.

Here's a nursery rhyme about Don Schneider:

Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet
Eating her curds and whey (this was before she became a vegan).
Along came a spider dressed up like Don Schneider
And invited Miss Muffet to attend an evangelistic meeting.

THE END

The Adventist News Network reports the church is tightening its belt:

Seventh-day Adventist Church leaders announced financial restraints and cutbacks to deal with the current economic situation, ranging from delaying pay increases and budgeted increases in appropriations to reducing travel budgets and relocating executive meetings. Also, a hiring freeze is in effect for the church's General Conference, one of several entities at the church's headquarters building near Washington, D.C.

[Pictured above from left to right: GC vice presidents Ella Simmons, Armando Miranda, Mark Finley, GC president Jan Paulsen, and vice presidents Pardon Mwansa and Eugene Hsu]

Obama - Not an Adventist

Just to satisfy you curious souls who can't sleep until you know for sure, President-elect Barack Obama is not Adventist, and so far, nobody has been able to conclusively demonstrate that he has any family connections to Adventism. So you can stop asking.

And he's not a Muslim either, in case you were still unaware of that fact. Now you know.

Caricatures of Adventists

Keeping you informed about

What Really Matters

Get Your Prophecy Chart Tee!

Now taking orders for this uniquely Adventist holiday gift.*

*Because of overwhelming popular demand, I have decided that this joke should become reality. People might actually buy this. Stay tuned for more.

Chuck Scriven calls for beefing up

There's a story behind this, and you can read it over at Spectrum.

How David Asscherick Became Rob Bell

David Asscherick is an Adventist evangelist and the main man for ARISE Institute (and please do not leave out the "I"). Asscherick (pronounced ASH-rick) won the Caricatures of Adventists who's-the-most-popular-Adventist contest by 4 votes over second place finishers Don C. Schneider and Hans Deihl. The prize for winning that popularity contest is the caricature above. Congratulations.

I also decided to tell David Asscherick's life story, or something close to it. Relatively little is known about Asscherick's early years, but they might have looked something like this:In order to fit in with other kids his age, young David wore a rubber mask and fought crime.He went through that awkward teenage phase that we all go through.As he matured, he began to transform into a nice young man who used to be a punk rocker and extreme sports enthusiast, but isn't any more. Except he still likes surfing and rock climbing, which could be considered extreme by some Adventists' standards.Now he preaches to youths and old people too, and he wears trendy glasses.David Asscherick, the guy who used to look like Alfalfa now looks like a postmodern, urban guy.In order to complete the transformation from somewhat geek to somewhat chic, David Asscherick stopped combing his hair to one side in order to look like...Rob Bell, who is a famous postmodern Christian guy who makes short movies with edgy themes. David Asscherick, who is sort of famous, but not really postmodern also makes short movies that are kind of edgy, in an Adventist way.
The End.

Adventist Pensions

Spooky times for SDA retirees.

St. Ellen The Pumpkin

Happy Halloween! For those of you not spooked by the word.

From the spirit of prophecy

Adventist Halloween Costumes

For Spectrum:

Halloween really spooks some Adventists (no fun intended):
"Seventh-day Adventists recognize that spiritualism has many faces. Some of them may seem harmless and even fun. Nevertheless, they lead children and adults away from God's truth, and can become stepping stones to further entanglement with the occult. Therefore, we do not recommend participation in the celebrations and festivities in connection with Halloween."

Gerhard Pfandl, Ph.D.
Associate DirectorBiblical Research Institute
From the Children's Ministries page of the GC website.

Asscherick Wins!

The 3,729 votes have been tabulated, and the winner of the Caricatures of Adventists popularity contest is David Asscherick, the Adventist evangelist and ARISE guy (not - a wise guy). Of course that this all means Asscherick will be the next lucky candidate to by visually dismantled by the Adventist Caricaturist. Congratulations to David Asscherick, and thanks to all 3,729 of you who participated in the poll!

Stay tuned for a lovely, original caricature of D. A. and more opportunities to have your say right here on Caricatures of Adventists.

Separated at Birth?

Prominent Seventh-day Adventists and their celebrity lookalikes
----------------------------

Doug Batchelor, Speaker / Director of Amazing Facts and his stunt doubleDon C. Schneider, President of the North American Division of SDAs and Cartman from South Park David Asscherick, Adventist minister / evangelist and Nedly Neilsworth the nerdy kid Don McLafferty, Childrens Ministries guy at the Collegedale SDA Church and Daniel Stern, the bad guy from the Home Alone movieJohn Byington, Adventist minister and first president of the General Conference of SDAs and Captain Ahab of Moby DickLloyd Mallory, Jr. Music Minister at the Sligo Adventist Church and Cedric the Entertainer, actorEllen G. White, Adventist pioneer and prolific writer and Lunch Lady Doris from the SimpsonsHyveth Williams, Senior Pastor of the Campus Hill Church in Loma Linda and Janice the Muppet Angel M. Rodriguez, President of the Adventist Biblical Research Institute and Yoda, Jedi master from Star WarsClifton Davis, Adventist pastor and actor and Denzel Washington, actorJames White, Adventist pioneer and Charles Darwin, naturalist and author John Nixon, Senior Pastor Collegedale SDA Church and the Albino from The Princess BrideGerald Penick, President of Southeastern California Conference and The Rock, professional wrestler-turned-actor. Goodloe H. Bell, Adventist pioneering educator and a broom.

Did we nail it? Are we way off? Have another look-alike suggestion for us? Leave a comment below!

Adventist Celebrity Look-alikes

Alonzo T. Jones, Adventist pioneer who emphasized grace over law keeping in 1888 and Wyatt Earp, law enforcer of the Wild West. Pastor Doug Batchelor, former caveman and President of Amazing Facts and Mr. Potato HeadJohn Harvey Kellogg, Advenist health foods manufacturer and founder of Kellogg's Foods and Harland David Sanders (aka Colonel Sanders), an entrepreneur and founder of Kentucky Fried Chicken Both the Colonel and Kellogg liked birds apparently, though perhaps for different reasons Rachel Oakes Preston, a pioneering Sabbatarian and Woman from the Great Depression Samuele Bacchiocchi, Adventist theologian and author and Sam the Eagle, a MuppetJohn N. Andrews, SDA pioneer and missionary and John Muir, naturalist and conservationistJohn Lomacang, Adventist recording artist and Prince, non-Adventist recording Artist Jose Rojas, Director of Volunteer Ministries and Cousin Pepe from Sesame Street Ned Flanders of the Simpsons and Pastor Dwight K. Nelson of Pioneer Memorial Church.

Hat tip to DC in Sweden for the Flanders / Nelson comparison!

Monte Sahlin

According to Monte Sahlin's typepad bio, he is "chairman of the board for the Center for Creative Ministry, a research organization and resource center helping pastors, congregations and other organizations understand new generations and how to engage with them. He is also chairman of the executive committee of the Center for Metropolitan Ministry, a "think tank" and training organization based on the campus of Columbia Union College in Washington, DC, as well as an adjunct faculty member at the Campolo School for Social Change at Eastern University in Philadelphia and in the DMin program at Andrews University. In addition, he serves on the steering committee of the Cooperative Congregational Studies Partnership, a coalition of researchers from more than 40 denominations and faiths who produce the Faith Community Today (FACT) research."

I lifted all that directly from his page and probably couldn't say it all in one breath. Which means that he does a lot!

Oh ya. He also blogs.

Asscherick Takes the Lead

In early polling (see the sidebar on the right), David Asscherick has a growing lead over Hans Diel and Don Schneider. With only a few days of voting left, can Asscherick ride this wave all the way to the finish line where the Adventist Caricaturist's ruthless pen awaits? Only YOU can decide that!

Not since the cartoon of Mohammed...

...Has a cartoon created such an uproar. This cartoon, slated for publication this week, got pulled because of some angry comments. Ahhh, the life of an editorial cartoonist. If it doesn't get people fired up, it's probably not doing its job. Well, here is the cartoon. Judge for yourself. Leave angry comments. I have a tough hide. I can take it. Maybe.

Vote. Vote NOW!

It's election time everyone, but this poll has nothing to do with politics. Well, maybe a little bit. Right now, there's a poll up on the side bar ---> providing you with the opportunity to select which Adventist personality will be next to undergo the pen treatment here on Caricatures of Adventists. Own a piece of this site by voting today!

Pathfinder vs. Pathfinder - Which Would Win?

For Spectrum:

Both of them are sturdy, adventurous and fun loving. Both have large engines and are equally at home on the streets or on rugged off-road terrain.

But if you had to choose just one, which Pathfinder would you prefer and why?

In a contest of speed, power and agility, which Pathfinder would you put your money on?

Doug is my Favorite!

I just really like doing caricatures of Doug Batchelor. He is soooo caricaturable!

Pastor Doug does a Governor Palin

You might find this interesting (or you might not). Pastor Doug Batchelor, speaker / director of Amazing Facts preached a long-winded sermon on homosexuality. You can watch the video on the AF website under a large banner that says, ironically, "Everlasting Gospel". Not that good news has much to do with it. But whatever.

The video has a couple of interesting lines in it. Like the statement that Jesus predicted this would be one of the obvious signs of the end. Interesting. I don't think Jesus ever mentioned homosexuality. But then, the facts there are supposed to be amazing...